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26 July 2019, 08:00
Photo: getty
5 Signs You're In Love With A Man Who Doesn't Have His Sh*t Together

If you've read your fair share of dating advice and are still attracting emotionally unavailable men, there are certain behaviors you must change when trying to find a partner.

Keywords: Dating, dating advice, men, immature men, emotionally unavailable men

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19 July 2019, 08:00
Photo: weheartit
20 Extremely Brutal Signs You're In Love With A Narcissist

Confident, charismatic, and overwhelmingly charming, there are few who can compete with a narcissist when it comes to making a fantastic first impression.

There are those who can see through the mask and those who can't. The latter will learn the hard way.

More than simply someone who likes to look in the mirror and talk about themselves, narcissists are master manipulators with a strong objective to objectify and an inability to empathize.

These men and women will do every possible thing they can to suck every last ounce of dignity and security out of their partners.

RELATED: 6 Signs You're In Love With A Serious Narcissist

And a relationship with them can be more than painful — it can be downright dangerous.

Here are 20 signs you might be dating a narcissist (only a professional can say for sure), and the many ways they'll ruin your life.

1. They're often super-attractive.

Even if they aren't Johnny Depp "gorgeous," their confidence, charm, and ability to "own a room" is an initial turn-on.

Until, of course, you're in your 30th conversation where you're being dominated, condescended, and shocked by their arrogant peacocking.

2. They mistake kindness for weakness.

Anyone who has ever found themselves pleading with a narcissist knows that the kinder you are, the meaner they become. These folks feel entitled to be cruel and will even go so far as to congratulate and brag about their ability to "cut people out," be "harsh," and humiliate others.

You may hear these kinds of statements slowly in the beginning, but because they're so "wonderful" in other areas at the time, you may write them off as situation-specific, or think you're misunderstanding them. You'll only really understand how serious of an issue this is during the discard phase when their lack of empathy comes out in its most concentrated form.

Victims will be treated in such a dismissive manner, and with such brutality that many will be left feeling they had to have caused it as no normal human being would ever respond that way over something so small or "nothing".

That's the point you need to hold onto. No "normal" human being would.

RELATED: 10 Ways To Spot A Narcissist On A First Date

3. They say you're perfect ... until you're not.

Narcissists are masters of "love bombing," which is "an attempt to influence a person by lavish demonstrations of attention and affection."

In the beginning of your relationship with them, they will text you constantly, want to see you as much as possible, and tell you all the things you want to hear: you're perfect, you're an "angel from heaven," you're extremely smart, and so on.

They do this to make you dependent on them, while also testing your boundaries. Are you going to back away or go with it? Will you reciprocate and follow suit? This shows them how much self-confidence you have and how strong you draw a line in the sand.

Once they discover that you're human, holy devaluation, Batman! You'll not only be told the opposite, but you'll be punished for your "imperfections," which are often exaggerated and sometimes nonexistent projections.

Punishment often includes terrible statements meant to degrade, demean, humiliate or stonewall you (not allowing you to express yourself). They withhold affection, and of course, give you the infamous narcissistic misericorde, aka the "silent treatment."

They may even spread nasty rumors about you behind your back.

4. They're incredibly jealous of others.

Successful and happy? Good looking and confident? Have a lot of friends or are a great cook? You're screwed.

Remember the business card scene in American Psycho? The narcissist I was with told me he related to that scene as though it was perfectly normal.

Narcissists also tend to be very jealous partners but only because, in their mind, you're a mere extension and a source of narcissistic supply, which they need to keep close and under their control.

They will often be very threatened by any success or attention you receive for fear they will lose access to said supply and either react with anger or faux caring.

Don't make the mistake in thinking it's you they want; it isn't. It's your attention, good or bad. That's it.

RELATED: How To Instantly Spot A Sociopath Or Narcissist

5. They're prone to cheating.

Will they forgo narcissistic supply in order to protect your feelings, which they don't understand, relate to, or care about? Guess how that one goes. Hell, they may even do it just to hurt you.

6. They use sex as a weapon.

They may watch porn, cheat, and think they're god's gift to the world, but because of their disdain for intimate connections, many narcissists prefer masturbation to sex with another person. They're known to make their partners go without sex as a way to frustrate, punish, and even humiliate them (out and out choosing porn over sex with them — and letting them know).

According to Dr. Sam Vaknin, a self-confessed narcissist and author of Malignant Self Love: Narcissism Revisited, all narcissists abhor intimacy and use sex as a weapon. Somatic narcissists "masturbate with partners" whereas cerebral narcissists, males, in particular, despise women and view sex with them as a "chore."

Cerebral's only have it on occasion to keep their source of supply (their partner) from leaving them.

RELATED: 3 Mind Games Narcissistic Men Play In Relationships

7. They're big on threesomes.

No, not those kinds.

Narcissists love to set up "triangles" where their partners feel "at odds" with someone else, and jealousy and fighting for love and attention can ensue (ah, the supply!).

This could be with an ex, a mother, or a friend, but the point is to make sure they're at the center of attention and desire.

This is known as triangulation and it's meant to make you feel insecure, undesirable, and keep you anxious and "on your toes."

8. They're Einstein and you're an idiot.

Not really, of course, but narcissists truly believe they're the only people left on earth who know anything, maintain any culture

Keywords: abusive relationships, Dating, dating advice, love, love advice, narcissism, narcissist, emotional abuse, dating a narcissist, narcissistic, NPD, Personality Disorders, Brenda Della Casa, signs of emotional abuse, signs of narcissism

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17 July 2019, 08:00
Photo: getty
6 Summer Date Ideas That Are Uber-Romantic

We all know summer is the perfect time of year for couples. The dresses get shorter, the days get longer, and everyone looks great from their newly acquired tan.

After a long, cold winter, the sun is finally making an appearance again. So, take advantage of the new season and get out there by planning date night ideas.

Whether you’ve been together for years or only been on a few dates, these summer date ideas are incredibly romantic and affordable. While the temperatures continue to rise, your love life will too.

RELATED: 15 Cute & Inexpensive Date Ideas For You & Your Partner When You're On A Budget

1. Take a romantic getaway.

How long has it been since you and your love took a trip? Even just one night away?

We’ve all heard the excuses: “Babe, I have work to do,” or, “I just don’t think I’m much of a camper.” Enough already. It doesn’t matter where you go or how long the trip is, just get away!

All too often we take for granted the time we have together, but not this summer. Plan a weekend away, just outside of town, or a week at the beach. Remember how good your girl looks in a bikini? If not, you will.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 

A post shared by @travelingbearcat on Apr 5, 2019 at 9:14am PDT

2. Go on a picnic.

With all the beautiful parks and beaches out there, it’s too bad you're inside right now! Hopefully, you’re reading this on your balcony or under a shady tree. But if not, go ahead and get going.

Grab a blanket, some wine, your man, and head out. Don’t run from the heat this summer; let it take you and your love out and about. When the sun is setting and you look right into his eyes, you’ll have a hard time keeping your hands off him.

Just don’t forget the bug spray or the mosquitoes won’t be able to stay away either.

14 July 2019, 08:00
Photo: getty
15 Crazy Facts About Kissing We Bet You Didn't Know

Knowing how to kiss, whether it's with someone you love or someone you just met, is no doubt a good feeling. But there are some facts about kissing you should know before you lock lips.

Keywords: foreplay, french kiss, kiss, Kissing, making out, facts about kissing, kissing facts

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08 July 2019, 08:00
Photo: getty
6 Signs That SCREAM You're The Rebound Girl (Or Guy)

Good dating advice will tell you to be weary of dating someone fresh out of a relationship. And if you notice any of these signs, he may be using you as his rebound relationship.

Keywords: Dating, dating advice, rebound, rebound relationship, Relationships

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08 July 2019, 08:00
Photo: getty
Sick & Tired Of Failed Relationships? This Is What You Need To Do

For people who constantly fail at love, there's some important relationship advice to follow. Because if you want to learn how to be happy, there are a few things you must change.

Keywords: happiness, relationship advice, Relationships, how to be happy

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07 July 2019, 08:00
Photo: getty
3 Reasons Why You Should Marry FIRST And Fall In Love Later

We all develop certain expectations about marriage from a young age, but here's some marriage advice you may not consider: focus on commitment, and then on falling in love.

Keywords: commitment, Dating, falling in love, Marriage, marriage advice, Relationships

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30 June 2019, 08:00
Photo: Tania Mousinho on Unsplash
Dating Tips For Women On How To Flirt With A Guy Over Texts

We asked men for their opinions flirty texts from women, and here's the scoop on how to flirt with a guy over text, based the Singles in America survey from Match and what our male friends said about texting.

Keywords: attraction, Dating, flirting, how to flirt, men, texting, what men think, how to get a guy to like you, communcation, how to flirt over text, how to flirt with a guy, how to text, how to text a guy

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29 June 2019, 08:00
Photo: getty
5 Sentimental First Anniversary Gifts

For couples celebrating their first wedding anniversary, it feels like you've come a far way already. But to celebrate your love, choose wedding anniversary gifts that show just how grateful you are.

Keywords: anniversary, Marriage, marriage advice, anniversary ideas

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25 June 2019, 08:00
Photo: getty
5 Ways To Leave Your Lover

When you're unable to leave your lover or teach yourself how to break up with someone, your self-esteem suffers. But when you change your thinking, you can remove yourself from toxic relationships.

Keywords: breakup, confidence, ending a relationship, Relationships, self-esteem, breakups

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